The Most Important Blog Post I Have Ever Written

I have been pondering what to write today. You see, I shared my book with you and as a result, I have many new eyes reading this post.

I felt pressure.

What do I write when I don’t know my new audience? How do I cater to what they want?

“If I could say just one thing to make them all happy and keep them around, what would it be?”

I don’t know. Guess what, I don’t need to know.

If I only wrote for what you wanted to hear, my writing would get old. I would be uninspired and repetitive. Yes, I want to keep you here. Yes, I want you to look forward to receiving my emails…but more than anything, I want to share my life with you. 

All I can hope is that you read what I have to say and take something away. Perhaps you can relate to me. Maybe you think I am funny (or not at all!). Perhaps you are drawn to reading my blog and you just can’t figure out why.

Well, let’s just set that all aside because I want to get down to it. Welcome to my blog {new readers} and thank you for your continued support {my faithful readers}.

Now here is my heart {a bit of my testimony}:

Me as a 30 year old mom!

I am a wretched sinner. Yes, most Christians are “trained” to say that…but I really mean it. If there was something “wrong” or “bad” to be done, I did it. And I didn’t care if you didn’t like it.

I burned many bridges down and I will never get them built back up. I hurt more people than I can remember and I pray each day that the Lord will continue to heal my regret.

I carry a heavy load. Guilt…blame…disgrace…dishonor…remorse…shame.

I battle my past each day. My daughter’s are such a blessing and I can easily view them as my second chance. I fight the desire to “make sure they do not make any of the mistakes I did.”

That is a heavy burden for them. One they should never have placed upon their shoulders.

It isn’t a burden I should carry anymore either. I lay it at the foot of the Cross.

If it weren’t for my Lord and Savior I would not have the life or family I have now. I surely do not deserve this. In fact, I do not deserve anything. However, I have everything. This is by nothing but the grace of God.

I grew up in a Christian home. I went to a Christian school and then a Christian college. I dropped out (then went back) and then dropped out again (and then went back again). I was selfish and focused only on what I wanted…what I deserved. Which is nothing.

Me at the ripe age of 21

At 23 I was brought to the end of myself. I couldn’t go on even one more day as I was. I was a believer of Jesus Christ but I had failed time and time again to live for Him.

Living for myself was going to kill me. 

I returned to an old {good} habit – journaling. I opened up a lined notebook and started writing. And writing. And writing. Calling out to the Lord. Begging for Him to be my daddy. Praying He would take away my shame. Crying out for Him to heal my open wounds. My hands hurt from my voracious writing. I had to get this onto paper. I had to see it. I had to make sure the enemy could see it.

My life was changing and it was no longer my strength but God’s.

I was finally giving my life to Jesus. Recommitting? Yes. Saved for the first time? Perhaps. I don’t know. I don’t know how to define this. I only knew I would never be the same.

My focus didn’t change instantly. I still had some battles to fight with self. Trust me they don’t go away all together, but I get stronger in the battle every time I open the Word of God.

What can I do to earn my salvation from God? Nothing.

What can I say to make things right? Nothing.

What can I believe to be saved? Jesus Christ died on the cross for you (and you, and you, and you). He did this so you could be saved. 

Right this minute. You can be saved.

You will not perish, but have everlasting life.

That sure sounds better than the alternative…in my humble opinion.

If you are not a believer, your life is in darkness. This is true regardless of how you feel.  He came to give you life in the light.

“He who believes in Him is not condemned, but he who does not believe is condemned already, because he has not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God.” John 3:18

So let’s clarify here: If you are not a believer and you do nothing – the issue does not go away. That is like receiving a big bill in the mail. You have to pay it. It is looming over you. You move it to the bottom of your stack of things to go through. You will deal with it another day. Then your power gets shut off. I bet you wish you had paid the bill? Or at a minimum, addressed the issue? You can’t put something off and take care of it later when it is a matter of life and death. You need to deal with it today.

But wait, this is a gift. What God gives {salvation} is a free gift. You believe, invite Him into your heart and you are saved. Don’t worry about the next steps. Don’t stress out about how to change your life. Just pray.

Pray. Read the Bible {new to this? Email me and I would be happy to give you a starting point}. Let the Lord guide your next steps.


That was heavy. For something “free” and straightforward, that was some serious meat and potatoes in my summer time stew. As I mentioned above, I was trying to figure out what to say to you all to appeal to you, but by doing so, I may not have written the most important message on my blog: a message of eternal life. Forgiveness. Redemption. Happily Ever After. 

The End.

For those curious about what to do next, please feel free to email me and we can chat! For those who are reading this as believers in Jesus Christ, please pray for all of those reading this who are not saved. God Bless.


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About Nikki


  1. Hickeyalisha says:

    Thanks for sharing this..absolutely beautiful:)

  2. Stacy @ Stacy Makes Cents says:

    :-) You’re such an inspiration, Nikki.

  3. Dtpeterson2 says:

    Thank you for sharing your story! I love to hear how Christ is/has been at work in lives! :)

  4. Thank you for making this extremely important subject so clear and personal!

  5. Hebrews113 says:

    This is MY story, too! THank you so much for having hte COURAGE to write this!!!

    With prayers of blessing,


  6. quickeasycheaphealthy says:

    Beautiful! Great post, Nikki!

  7. Wow, I knew we had similar stories, but even our “turning points” were the same. I didn’t drop out of college, I was just the opposite. So hard headed that I finished early, but when I look back at all that was taking place during that time…I’m not surprised that I don’t remember much. I was just telling Mark last night, there are so many periods of my life that I simply do not remember. Part of it is answered prayers, but most of it was pure foolishness. I am so grateful for a God of grace and mercy. I’m so grateful for a God who never gives up on me, a God who is not ashamed to be called my God. Thanks for sharing, Nikki! I pray many are blessed.

  8. I just shared part of my testimony last Sunday at church. It’s amazing the insight we get by looking back on who we were compared to who we are now. There is no way I would be who I am today without the love of Jesus! I love that we all have our own different stories yet we’re all saved by the same Super Hero and He manages to bring us all together. I love hearing stories of Jesus saving people like me. People who were broken but are now fixed! :) Thank you for sharing!!!!

  9. Amen! I can completely relate to this. You took the words from my mouth. :-) Thank you for sharing. So encouraging. :-)

  10. Thehumbledhomemaker says:

    Thanks for sharing your story! Great post! And you look so much prettier now than at 21!! :)

  11. Ashley Schulze says:

    This post really gave me hope. I thank God you had the courage to post this, because I needed someone to reach out in my journey

    • Ashley I would love to pray for you! Anything specific? Thanks for commenting. Very encouraging!
      —– Reply message —–

  12. Also my story. You’re brave to share. THANKS FOE ENCOURAGING US ALL.

  13. This is a fantastic post!!!!!! So glad you shared this and how bold you were! I am going to repin this and do you care if I share this on our FB page for our blog???

  14. Wonderful to see your joy mi amore! Oh how great is our God :)

  15. Beautiful post. May you continue to be blessed in all you do as you continue to try to live the life God has created for you.

  16. thank you for sharing your story – may the Lord use it to encourage many and point those who need to be to Him..


  17. This ‘growing up in a Christian family, church, etc’ was also my situation. I was saved when I was 8, but it never changed my life. I am sure that I was saved because I KNEW that I was doing wrong and not living a life pleasing to God. I had a VERY HARD time turning 30 and that was my turning point. It’s been all up hill since then (I just turned 32). It’s so crazy to look back and realize that somethings that are happening now didn’t happen before because we weren’t ready. (My hubby is starting his own business….and it is DIFFICULT, but we are, spiritually, in a place that we can handle it). I’m so thankful that the Lord changed my heart and am humbled at how far He’s brought me in living for HIm. It’s not always easy to be a Christ-follower, but the benefits so out weigh the difficulties! Great post, I’m sure you will inspire many as ‘young Christians from Christian homes’ tend to fall away way too much!

  18. Nikki – Thanks for sharing this at the twitter party tonight! I would go further to say that if we are inclined to invite God into our Heart… He is actually already there! The Holy Spirit is who drives us to God, so if we are feeling the urge to call out to Him, that doesn’t come from us, that only comes from God :) God calls us and we, in turn, call back to Him :) This is a wonderful testimony :) Love seeing how God has worked in other people’s stories!!!


  1. [...] with my sin!) keeps messing things up. I do things my way. I disrespect my husband. I don’t share the gospel when I could. I don’t always seek His [...]